I Really Want You - A Performer's Words

Last night I went to see James Blunt in concert. I was expecting a pretty low key affair. When I've seen him in videos he always seemed sad, depressed. I was really shocked to see him live in Seoul with an energy and an intensity way beyond my expectations. He smiled a lot, he was in his element; not only a composer and singer, but also an entertainer.

He was really enjoying himself and I could almost see how he was absorbing the energy from the audience, even surprising us by jumping into the crowd and running through, letting everyone touch him. I was up in the rafters, but that was okay. Running up to touch an artist is not really my thing. I don't need to touch, I don't need an autograph, I just want to experience.

I went alone and sat next to some Americans, one of whom was an interesting woman from California. It was an awesome concert. I'm really happy I got to see the pleasure on his face, a smile like a five-year old child's, lighting up the stage.

The more morose songs were sung with every fiber of his being and I felt a connection there, like we had experienced similar things. I had downloaded songs from his "All the Lost Souls" album, since I hadn't had a chance to buy it yet. There was a song there called "I Really Want You." I guess I must have downloaded a shortened version. It was not among my favorites. But last night, I heard a different version and I was carried away by his words. Words that reflected my own heart. I absorbed the energy of it all and wished he could hear it.

After the show, they were selling his albums. I bought it and when I listened to it at home, it was missing something. During the concert, James Blunt added some verses of his own. The original lyrics:


I Really Want You - James Blunt

Many prophets preach on bended knee Many clerics wasted wine.
Do the bloodied sheets on those cobbled streets mean I have wasted time?
Are there silver shores on paradise? Can I come in from the cold?
I killed a man in a far away land, my enemy I'm told.

I really want you to really want me, but I really don't know if you can do that.
I know you want to know what's right, but I know it's so hard for you to do that.
And time's running out as often it does, and often dictates that you can't do that.
But fate can't break this feeling inside that's burning up through my veins.

I really want you.
I really want you.
I really want you- now.
No matter what I say or do, the message isn't getting through,
And you're listening to the sound of my breaking heart.
I really want you.
I really want you.

Is a poor man rich in solitude, or will Mother Earth complain?
Did the beggar pray for a sunny day, but Lady luck for rain?
They say a million people bow and scrape to an effigy of gold.
I saw life begin and the ship we're in and history unfold.

I really want you to really want me but I really don't know if you can do that.
I know you want to know what's right but I know it's so hard for you to do that.
And time's running out as often it does and often dictates that you can't do that.
But fate can't break this feeling inside that's burning up through my veins.

I really want you.
I really want you.
I really want you- now.
No matter what I say or do, the message isn't getting through,
And you're listening to the sound of my breaking heart.
No matter what I say or do, the message isn't getting through,
And you're listening to the sound of my breaking heart.

During the concert he added words to this effect:I killed a man in a far away land, my enemy I'm told. So I went to see him and I saw that he looked just like me...
We are our biggest enemies. The doubts, insecurities and pain we feel are always greater when we inflict them upon ourselves. I can say this intellectually, I can understand it logically, but it is my heart dictating my every cell and I have not been able to turn it off. Will I wake up one day with a heart cast in stone? Is it possible? I struggle between wishing for it and rejecting it. One day, I will wake up and the decision will have been made. I will wait and see what happens.