Cradle

In your arms...in my arms...cradled.

As though a precious breakable thing.

Unseen but felt...a hope the net will hold

Alone?

Yes...but it need not be a draining dragging sadstain on skin

Alone?

Yes...but cradled

Cradled...

...cradled.

Pipe Dreams

There is something to be said about dreams. They are potent. Alive. All encompassing.

They make you believe it can be and is real...a little cloud of "Hope" you sit upon as you build it up, closer and closer to the goal.

And then suddenly you look down upon your once soft cushion and realize the cloud has evaporated under the heat of the sun and you are falling, falling back down to earth.

Awake.

Some People Have Real Problems - Ode to Sia

Some people have real problems

I read one day

On the jacket of a cd.


No place to stay

A black eye from last night’s domestic fight

Locked away by the flip of a coin: a case of mistaken evidence

Abandoned by irresponsible parents


Some people have imaginary problems

Electric currents pulsing through you in rapid succession

Turning beauty into nightmare

Happiness to emptiness

Easy to hard

Energy to inertia

Lust to love


Some people have no problems

In a perfect world

A perfect inner heaven

A perfect bountiful sea


Some people can’t tell the difference

Nonna Mia

Once upon a time,
She was vibrant,
The quintessential grandmother
A homestyle meal, a fresh salad from the garden, a slap on the rump
When your actions were just a bit on the 'cheeky' side
And I loved that woman.
But she left us,
Years ago now,
Her body on earth, but her mind far away
Now...her body has joined her mind.
Farewell, nonna mia.
You're on a new journey now.

Opening the Eye

I taste the salt from my belly button

Tinged with the memory of tears

As I try to open the eye

I feel myself sinking back into the depths

Of where I was

And can no longer be

I open the pages

To scribbles written

Barely legible

Telling me of truths

That my cells already know

But are too full to absorb

The eye is pink and crusty

But I crack it open

And read.

Asparagus Gym

I wake up at 5:45a.m. and my body cringes at the thought of rising from the comfort of bed. It is cold out there. Everything tells me to refuse the offer of a sunrise workout.

But I get up and I go and pick asparagus as my hamstrings, my quadraceps and my glutes burn hour upon hour.

And I smile as I pause...I'm being paid for this. For getting back into shape.

I am blessed.

How to Disappear Completely

How to Disappear Completely- Radiohead

It is time. I have spent enough time doing things for others, trying to make things work, trying to repay debts, trying to keep relationships alive and well. Now is my time and I know what to do.

Now, it is time for me. I embark upon a journey unknown, a future unknown, a life unplanned, without expectation, except to find myself.

One day, perhaps, I will return. Perhaps I will be stronger. Perhaps I will have a sense of self that will not fade or hide or die. Perhaps I will be what I've always wanted.

Now, it is time. Time to disappear completely.